


and it is in dying that we are born to eternal life

by Ephemeral_Joy



Category: Anne with an E (TV)
Genre: Canon Compliant, F/M, Fluff, Friends to Lovers, Hurt/Comfort, Love, Post-3x03, bash is not okay, gilbert is trying
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-10-08
Updated: 2019-10-08
Packaged: 2020-11-27 17:35:21
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,178
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20952248
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Ephemeral_Joy/pseuds/Ephemeral_Joy
Summary: His eyes roved her face, intent and fond. Her heart hammered in her throat and she felt her breathing shallow. She suddenly forgot she was here for Delphine, not for Gilbert. She should’ve left right after the baby fell asleep. Marilla and Matthew would worry. She should go. She really should.One week after Mary's death, Anne is needed at the Blythe household to take care of Delphine.She ends up having a heart to heart with Gilbert, and then something more.





	and it is in dying that we are born to eternal life

**Author's Note:**

> I cried from the first second to the last and then some more after.
> 
> edited | not beta'd | title from the prayer said in the episode (i know i have a multichap going on but,,, i'm in a tussle with it alright)
> 
> wanna talk more? https://lydias--stiles.tumblr.com/  
@theystayalive and me have a podcast about awae! youtube.com/channel/UC1PPO4Fcyo5zcse3zZW-L6g

**o n e w e e k l a t e r**

‘Thank you so much for coming, we don’t know what to do,’ Bash’ words rushed from his lips as Gilbert and Anne busted through the Blythe household, the latter carrying a basket. It was late at night, nowhere in sight was a light to be seen, and Delphine was crying her lungs out. Nothing worked, and so Gilbert went to get Anne and Marilla. Marilla had been sleeping by the time he arrived at Green Gables, but the ginger had been wide awake, reading. One look shared and she instantly knew something was wrong, sprung to her feet and rode after him on Belle. 

‘No worries,’ she said, airy, ‘I’m quite knowledgeable on babies. I even saved Minnie May once!’ She followed the sound of the wailing. ‘Have you changed her nappy?’

‘Yes,’ Bash said, closeby. Gilbert was one step behind. 

‘Fed her?’

‘Uh, yeah. Not… breastfed, but…’

‘You have bought enough formula, right?’

‘We did.’

Anne scooped Delphine out of her cot, swaying her. ‘She doesn’t seem sick. Maybe she just misses a woman’s touch-’ the girl stopped herself, eyes wide and grieved as she glanced at Bash. He looked pained, a dark weight looming on his shoulders. ‘I’m  _ so  _ sorry, I didn’t  _ mean  _ to say that, I-’

‘It’s okay,’ Bash quipped, keeping his gaze on the ground. It’s the first time Anne had seen Bash with his guards down ever since Easter when Mary had relaxed in his embrace, close-eyed and a peaceful smile on her face. Anne found she looked like an angel - or rather that an angel took her to the sky, past the dense clouds of sickness that had been suffocating her for the past week. The celebration was stopped shortly after that. Marilla had cried silent tears. Gilbert had bawled, harder than when she hugged him. She had hugged him then too, sitting next to him on the steps as she had placed his face in the crook of her neck. 

‘Just make her stop crying.’ Bash went outside. 

Anne’s eyes fell on Gilbert, who was staring back at her blankly, hands stuffed in his trousers. 

‘Maybe you’re right,’ he mumbled, rubbing his cheek. ‘A woman’s touch.’ He sat next to her on the bed. 

It was quiet between them for a long time, letting Delphine talk for them with her wailing. Silent camaraderie. Slowly, her crying subsided, hiccups and sniffles remaining.

Gilbert chuckled. ‘It worked.’

‘Yeah…,’ she gave him a firm look, ‘Matthew said Jerry would be happy to help sometimes. With school and the orchard and Delphine - you can’t be at two places at once.’ A teasing lilt entered her voice as she nudged him. ‘Got to beat you to college fair and square, right?’

‘That would be kind,’ Gilbert nodded, wary. ‘But I’m not sure we’ll be able to pay him.’

‘We’ll figure something out.’ Delphine quieted, Anne carefully placing her back in her cot. The two stepped out the bedroom, keeping the door ajar. From the dark window, she could make out Bash’ silhouet, wandering aimlessly around the orchard, kicking rocks and grass. 

‘He’s a little lost right now.’ Anne felt Gilbert’s warm breath in her neck as he said those words. She shivered. 

‘I’m not surprised,’ she gave him a rueful smile, ‘he lost his one true love.’

Gilbert looked thoughtful, a frown on his forehead as he mulled over something. Afraid that she hit a wrong button - again -, she moved on to something else. They sat down at the kitchen table.

‘How are you holding up?’

He sighed, ‘I don’t know.’ His tone was genuine as he locked eyes with her. Gilbert hadn’t been in school much, helping Bash with the orchard and Delphine so Anne'd been handing him his work after school. Gilbert looked perpetually tired, with hollow irises and downturned lips. But for this one moment, a smile pulled on his face. ‘I don’t know,’ he repeated. ‘Mary was… I never had a mom and I never felt like I missed anything, but Mary was… she was my mom. She cared for me in a way…’, her voice withered, gulping hard as his jaw clenched. Instinctively, she grabbed his balled hand. Gilbert relaxed, softening his hold and letting his fingers trail across her fingers. 

‘I get it,’ Anne whispered, ‘I never thought Matthew and Marilla could love me, but they’re my family.’ Her mouth quirked upwards. ‘I love them.’

Gilbert paused his hand, encircling it around hers. Her heart momentarily halted. ‘Yeah, you and Marilla have something special.’

‘We but heads, don’t even worry about that,’ she assured, trying not to focus on how perfectly his hand fit in hers, the way she always wrote about it in her tragical romance stories. Bash stomped back inside, eyes red and lips dry and pale. He stared at her. 

‘She’s asleep?’

Anne nodded, very aware he could see their entwined hands. ‘She’s in her cot, safe and sound like the angel she is.’ Bash didn’t reply, simply nodded and disappeared in the bedroom. A moment of shuffling around, ruffling of clothes and then it was quiet again. Her hand had begun to be warm and a little sweaty, yet she still didn’t mind his touch. It felt right, from the crown of her head to the pit of her stomach. She wondered what if would be like to hold both, or to touch his hair. Or jaw. 

Anne blinked: focus. 

Suddenly, Gilbert spoke up. ‘What did you mean with Bash losing his one true love?’

‘I don’t understand,’ Anne frowned. 

Gilbert leaned forward, ready to start one of the many discussions that happened between them weekly. ‘It implies there’s only one person for everyone. That can’t be true. The chances of meeting them are almost impossible.’

Anne frowned. She hadn’t realised how cynical Gilbert really was on the topic of love, but she supposed that was what happened after losing John and Mary. She hoped Bash’ heart wouldn’t turn bitter. ‘I think you can be in love with more than one person in your life, but… I do think there’s one soulmate. I have a wonderful tribe of kindred spirits, but only one soulmate.’

His eyes roved her face, intent and fond. Her heart hammered in her throat and she felt her breathing shallow. She suddenly forgot she was just here for Delphine,  _ not  _ for Gilbert. She should’ve left right after the baby fell asleep. Marilla and Matthew would worry. She should go. She really should. 

Gilbert peered at her, smiling. ‘That’s a nice thought.’ His eyes glazed over, thoughts drifting away to something in the distance, something that Anne couldn’t reach no matter how hard she tried. Over the past year she’d been able to read him better, but sometimes he was on another planet. 

‘What are you thinking about?’ She leaned into his body, their faces closer than ever.

‘Um,’ he cleared his throat, ‘Mary told me - on one of her final days - she told me that I should marry for love… only for love.’ He grinned, wry. ‘Of course, you’d say the same thing.’

Her smile was wobbly as her mind surged back to Mary’s bright face and watery eyes. ‘Mary was a wise woman.’ She missed her so much.

(Anne hadn’t realised how close their faces were until Gilbert’s free hand touched her cheek, swiping a tear away.) 

‘Anne.’

Her eyes fell from his eyes to his lips to his cheeks to his eyes and repeated the pattern. Her mind was frazzled and screaming at her to lean back. But if felt natural. Right. Perfect. 

‘Did you want me to post on the “Take Notice”-board?’ 

Did she? Did she mean her instead of Ruby a month ago? Did she want him to keep looking at her with that fond look in his eye? Did she love the thrill of her stammering heart and airy smiles whenever he looked her way? Whenever he really  _ looked  _ at her and it felt like flowers were blooming around her lungs and she breathed in the sweetness of the moment. Being around him was like honey. Being around him was like dancing on top of the chicken coop and screaming her favourite songs early in the morning. 

Yes, Anne came to the realisation, calm. She did want him to. 

Entranced, the girl nodded, barely noticeable. His hand travelled down to her jaw, thumb caressing the soft skin. He smirked. ‘ _ Unfortunately _ , I’m not a “Take Notice” kind of guy.’ 

He closed the small gap that was left between them, his lips carefully falling onto hers. She sucked in a deep breath, frozen. They were soft and warm. 

Gilbert instantly pulled back, realising she was rigid. He looked flushed and extremely apologetic. ‘Anne, I’m sorry I shouldn’t-’

Anne grabbed his face and planted her lips back on his, smiling. Gilbert responded, smiling as well as their lips melted together. Now, she felt the warmth coursing through her body as goosebumps erupted all over. One hand found its way to his hair, feeling how soft the curls were. Gilbert leaned in closer at her touch, kissing her over and over and over again. Every peck felt like an electrical charge. 

If someone had asked her to describe the moment in one sentence, she’d say it was like taking a dive into the ocean and emerging after a long time, feeling the air and adrenaline rush through your body a mile a minute, from your head to your toes. 

Or she’d say something simpler. Like the first flower that bloomed in spring.

Eventually, the two flustered teenagers breathed again, Gilbert’s cheeks an adorable red. His green eyes were alight with an indescribable emotion. He laughed, softly. 

‘I didn’t expect that, Anne Shirley-Cuthbert.’

‘Same goes for you, Gilbert Blythe,’ she quipped. She was positive her face was as red as her ridiculous hair. 

They both grinned, processing what had just happened. She kissed Gilbert.  _ She kissed Gilbert _ . She freaking kissed Gilbert at midnight in his house.

‘I’m going home.’ Anne slowly stood up, unable to properly think or move or do anything. How long had she been here? 

‘Yeah,’ Gilbert coughed, ruffling his hair. Her hands had just been playing with it. 

‘Will I see you on Monday at school?’, she asked, hopeful. 

His hands found their way back to hers and squeezed them tightly. Natural, right,  _ perfect _ . He looked at her like she handed him the sun on a silver platter. 

'Let me walk you to school,' he proposed, quirking on eyebrow. 

Her heart was about to burst. 'That sounds nice.'

After a tentative hug by the front door, Anne ascended Belle and left the Blythe property. Her cheeks felt like they were on fire, despite the cold night air. Gilbert and her  _ kissed _ ! She couldn't find it in her to feel guilty towards Ruby. It wasn't her fault Gilbert like her, right? If this actually continued - Anne squealed - they'd have to tell her as soon as possible. She pooches her lips: poor Ruby. But perhaps, after the conversation, she will open her heart to other boys. Whether it be Moody with his ridiculous handkerchief or a new one at Queen's College. 

When Anne fell down onto her bed, an unwavering beam on her face, she couldn't wait till the first rays of sunshine hit Green Gables. 

(At seven thirty on the dot, Gilbert would be at her door. Anne would hastily kiss Marilla and Matthew on the cheek and rush out before they got the chance to see who it was. Marilla would have an inkling though, and for the first time since Mary's passing she'd feel a genuine smile building on her lips. Gilbert and Anne would feel the buzz of excitement dancing around them, him carefully taking her hand when they left the property. She would silence her mind that was protesting because what in the world of everything amazingly beautiful was she  _ doing _ ? He would kiss her cheek, a ridiculous grin on his face. They'd walk in silence, the occasional hum coming from him, relishing each other's presence. Her hand would slip out of his once the school came into view, promising him she'd talk to Ruby first. He'd get it, and sneakily kiss her knuckles before saying goodbye, leaving her standing breathless. 

A few days later, they would walk in together, hand in hand. Laughing, talking. Josie would pull her nose up, but the two wouldn't care. Billy wouldn't even find the words to insult her. 

The day after, they'd kiss again at the Green Gables gate, knowing full well Marilla and Rachel were spying on them behind the curtain. 

More weeks passed, and while some were waiting for the other shoe to drop and the relationship to end - it didn't. It never did. Seeing each other had become their favourite activity. 

"When did you fall in love with each other?" one would ask years later. They'd share a glance and shrug. There was no beginning or no end, just everything in between.)


End file.
